izzy

I kiss the dirt like it is your forehead
I tell the waves to fuck off like they are your whisper
teasing that we’ll knock ‘em dead one day
make all those boys sorry they were born
grow up to be real heartbreakers

I eat bread like it’s your bones
like I could fill myself up with it
learn to run again, like a real girl
like more than a brittle effigy

I can’t see shit without my glasses these days
unless it’s up real close and personal
breathing moist against my cheek, you
are so far away you’re like a fog

I don’t trust my own memory.
I always sit in the same place on buses.

saccharine crack between teeth –
were you thrust into this?
sometimes I think we all were –
50 cents of gumdrop glory
sinking in the pit.

I hate halloween, creeping around your birthday
like a dog done wrong
reminder that the dead don’t rise
reminder that this is another year missed

I toast you like you’re still here
toast you like you’ll live forever

you could have lived forever.

*

sarah

Midnight interview.

What is the colour of love?
A purpley kind of a colour.
What is the sound of love?
Wind rustling through shredded crepe paper dangling from wire coathangers.
What is the most beautiful thing?
You are.
What else is the most beautiful thing?
Baked potatoes.
Do it properly.
A baby.
When was the last time you felt really happy?
Pass.
How many people have you ever loved?
Twenty? I don’t know. Maybe not twenty. I don’t know.
When did you feel the most grown up?
When I was twenty-eight.
Why?
I was a lecturer. People listened to me. I had a staff parking permit.
If you had a megaphone, and you could say something to the whole world, what would it be?
Help.
Help what?
Just help exclamation mark.
Have you ever seen snow?
Yes.
Have you ever made a snow angel?
Yes.
Have you ever kissed anyone under mistletoe?
No.
What are three words that describe how you would like to be as a person?
Better. Better. Better.
What’s the earliest song you remember hearing?
‘My grandfather’s clock.’ Or ‘Where’s your momma gone?’
When did you first realise that you were a boy, and that was different from girls?
Probably in the bath. With my sister. She didn’t have a penis.
What’s the best book you’ve ever read?
I really liked ‘Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency.’ But the sequel was shit.
What song do you want played at your funeral?
‘Joy to the World.’ The Jeremiah was a bullfrog one.
What’s your favourite photo of yourself?
I like one of me and my sister what I was about two.
Why?
Cos I’m smiling a lot and I look very happy.
What do you want to dream about tonight?
Something interesting.
Like what?
Oh, I don’t know. Ice skating on the school quadrangle or something.
Pick a word. Any word.
Coagulate.
Say goodnight in any language other than English.
Guten nacht.

*